https://bit.ly/3nRyPsd https://bit.ly/2ZRLwe0 https://bit.ly/3GL2qvX https://bit.ly/3GQXy8S https://bit.ly/2ZR4iSP https://bit.ly/3k3VuAj https://bit.ly/2ZVLd2f https://bit.ly/3mH5XmZ https://bit.ly/3CILqEi https://bit.ly/2ZKd5WO https://bit.ly/3GLLaXu https://bit.ly/3weStlv https://bit.ly/3CH92ck https://bit.ly/2ZZxx6m https://bit.ly/3jYyOS4 https://bit.ly/3wdg6eq I spray more lighter fluid on the coals, light them. He sets the lighter fluid right next to the grill (Which is one of those small ones that sits on the ground). This guy is going to fucking kill us. We wait five minutes, and still can't get the coals to burn. Eventually, we just say "fuck it" and just douse the coals in fluid and burn the shit out of our hotdogs... Rich Boy: "I hope you like your hotdogs burnt." Proud of our BBQ prowess, we go inside and eat. Being the firesafe guy that I am, I let the coals burn out for about an hour and a half. I'm so smart. They cool down. Great. Hmm, now what to do, what to do? What did those fuckers do with these coals after they were done? Did they dump them in the grass? There's no way. They would have set the brush on fire. I'm smarter than that. Dump them on the concrete? I don't see any old coals anywhere, and besides, that's too unsightly. What about those metal trashcans in the back? We dump plastic and cardboard in those, so that's a no go. Can't fool me. I'm Mr. Firesafety. Oooooooo, look! An empty trashcan! I'll dump them in there. And even if the coals are still a little hot, there's nothing in the trashcan that can be set on fire. I touch the coals with my hands, just as another measure of safety. I smile, dump out the coals. And just to show what a good boy I am, I even clean out the residue. I look inside of the trashcan for any signs of a fire. Nothing. Can't outsmart me. Thirty minutes go by. I'm fine. I'm so firesafe. Everyone should hire me to show them the rules of fire safety. A customer comes inside. Great, I'll get them... Customer: "Holy crap! Did you guys BBQ!?" Why yes we did. They must have smelled my o-so-delicious hotdogs, and couldn't resist coming in for one... Customer: "Cause you guys have a HUGE fire on the side of your building!!" There's a firetruck, police car, ambulance, everything outside. It never occurred to me that the trashcan was made COMPLETELY out of plastic. It wasn't one of our metal ones. The entire trashcan burns down, and guess what was the only thing left behind? That's right, those damn coals that wouldn't burn. You know what? I feel like talking to the girl I met last week during the Rubber Ducky story (the one that was hitting cars while parking)... Me: "So, did you ever find your sister?"
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